Being pregnant makes you clumsy. Who knew?! I seriously cannot hold on to anything these days. I've stopped picking up fragile things because it's only a matter of time before I fumble it out of my fingers and break it. I'm like Chunk holding the frame in the attic in "Goonies".
My klutziness reached a new level this past weekend, though. I am now seven months pregnant (31 weeks), and getting big enough that my center of balance is off kilter. We have beautiful hardwood floors in our house, including a staircase that runs from the bedrooms upstairs to the main floor of the house. I am always extremely careful on these stairs, especially in the winter as socks + hardwood stairs = slippery disaster. I have a fear, nay, phobia, of falling down stairs while pregnant, so I generally clutch the handrail like I'm trying to strangle it. Well, this past weekend, as I neared the bottom of said stairs, I put the arch of my socked foot down on the edge of the step, and faster than you can say "Kristy Yamaguchi", that foot went flying out from under me. (I'm lovin' the 80's pop culture references today...) I landed hard on my butt and hit my back on the stair above my butt and then slid down two more stairs before finally coming to rest. As falls go, this was nothing. It was really just me sitting down hard, plus a bruise on my back. There are no other repercussions (other than the bruise), and the baby is still kicking up a storm and growing like crazy. I wasn't hurt, but man oh man, did it scare the crap out of me. I sat there for a while - Allen jumped out of his chair to come to my aid, and our house guest ran up from the basement to make sure I was okay - and after about 20 minutes of assuring myself that we were all okay, I burst into tears.
Hi. My name is Autumn and I'm pregnant and emotional.
It was the relieved but shaken and a little freaked out kind of crying, so I just got it out of my system and moved on. I think being so close to the end but still having an appreciable amount of pregnancy left is kind of an emotional landmine. I've talked about milestones before - the first trimester, the first heartbeat, the 20 week ultrasound - and we've hit them all. But now we're in no-man's land. The baby is gaining weight and prepping to be born, and I'm just willing him to stay in there until the right time. I know a few friends and friends of friends who have had their babies way too early and I am terrified of that outcome. It's a hard road to travel and watching a good friend go through it first-hand really brought home how scary it is and how helpless you are in the end. Maybe I'm dwelling on this because of the miscarriage? Or maybe it's just because I'm a control freak and I can't control anything about this? (Let's be honest here. It's probably the latter...)
Whatever the cause, I'm trying to let it go. I can't control when the baby will make his entrance. I can only plan and try to stay as healthy as possible. And maybe be extra careful on those stairs from now on... Or buy grippy soled socks.
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