I know. Of all the people to have a c-section, it had to be the girl ranting about the ridiculous increase in c-sections and how many of them are performed unnecessarily. In my defense, I have also been saying that when they are necessary, they are extremely useful and I am grateful we have access to the medical technology. I just happened to be one of the few who actually needed one.
I'm still not sure how much detail I want to go into in a public forum, but the gist is that I was in active labor for 30 hours, 20 hours under direct midwife supervision. I couldn't eat, was getting dehydrated and was rapidly losing energy. My cervix never got much past 80% effaced and 5or 6 cm dilated, and the baby was not moving down. The my cervix started to re-harden. Un-efface, if you will. We made the decision to go to the hospital for an epidural.
Yep. I had an epidural. It was absolute magic. I was exhausted, and the contractions were agonizing. I was sobbing through each one and when I got dehydrated, dry sobbing. Then the back labor kicked in - the baby was still pretty actively moving around in there, and the vomiting started not long after that. Before we went to the hospital, I had the distinct thought, "I am in serious trouble, here." I was beginning to move from worried to terrified. When that anesthesiologist walked in with the epidural... I have never been more relieved to see anyone in my life. Eventually, the epidural wore off some on the right side and I had to have it increased. I was tipped over to the left to keep the baby's heart rate up and such and so the epidural was flowing away from the right side. I should mention that this epidural was crazy strong. I couldn't feel my legs. But I was so exhausted and in so much pain that I didn't care. I was just so glad to have some relief from the pain. And honestly, after 30 hours? I think I earned it. And I'm leaving out the more gory details about stretching membranes and how it was the worst pain I've ever felt in my life. Bar none. And I've had multiple piercings.
So, under the influence of an epidural and pitocin, I finally fully effaced and dilated, and pushed for and hour and a half. I didn't understand time-travel in relation to labor until then. Because it seemed like the blink of an eye. The baby's heart rate had been dropping and then took a pretty severe dip. This, in combination with the meconium in the amniotic fluid, and the fact that he still wasn't moving down into my pelvis despite pushing, made the doctor call it. Time for a c-section. I cried. A lot. But ultimately, I recognized that we had tried literally every other option. Time to move on.
Our Butterbean was born on February 28. He had the cord wrapped around his neck twice and his legs once. He couldn't move down into my pelvis because he was so tangled up. He also had to have his lungs suctioned to make sure he didn't aspirate any meconium. Aside from the doctor who delivered him and the pediatric nurse who worked on him immediately afterward, Allen was the first to hold him. Once I was all sewn up, they let me have skin to skin contact with him all the way back to the room. They never pushed formula, never took him out of our sight. They did take him to the nursery a few times for tests and pediatrician visits, but Allen stayed with him the whole time. All in all, we were pretty impressed and pleased with how they treated us. We didn't have to fight them on anything. It was a much better experience than I could have hoped for.
Recovering from a c-section sucks. I have no idea why anyone would choose this over a vaginal delivery. It's major abdominal surgery and it's tough to bounce back from. Plus, epidurals mean a groggy baby. And a c-section means no delayed cord clamping and no immediate contact with your baby. Having said all of that, I have absolutely no regrets about the c-section. It was absolutely the right decision and I am grateful to the doctors and nurses who delivered our baby guy into the world. If we didn't have access to the medical technology, we would have had a very poor outcome for both me and the baby.
A c-section was my very last choice in delivery options, and I still kind of can't believe I ended up having one. But I am positive that it was the right decision. And though I am in the throes of recovery and all that entails, I look at my beautiful, perfect, healthy son and I can't be anything but grateful.
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